Children come first, they don't have a voice. It is up to parents to protect them. Your husband needs to go to counselling. Yelling is negative and angry. So bad for children. Try and record his yelling one day, play it back to him when he is calm and tell him that this is how he sounds all day. He will hear how ridiculous he sounds and hopefully stop. He can help himself, that isn't just how he is. This is a learned behavior that is completely changeable if he acknowledges this problem. Get some outside help. Maybe let him read all of these answers.My Husband is always yelling at our kids(3%26amp;1 YR. OLD) for everything they do.NEED ADVICE HELP!?
I Think That its very Wrong To Yell At your Children, especially at 1 and 3, at Everything they do. When They Do SomeThing totally Wrong, you have to TELL them that its wrong so they Dont do it again. Thats it. No yelling. Just Gently telling them. But The thing is, you also have to sound serious so they know not to do it again.
I Agree with you, yelling will effect their later life. I think that you need to really work this out with your husband. If This Doesnt Work, you need to get help such as Anger Management For your Husband.
In Conclusion, I do Believe that you should Stand By Your Children.
Try this web site....www.babycenter.com..... there is allot of information that tells you how to deal with a child that is out of control... with out yelling.... spanking etc... that are very affective... sit down with him show him the documentation and tell him hey lets just try it there way and see if the kids straighten up.... make it sound like it is his ideal though.... and make it sound like its a group effort that hes not doing anything wrong... because this will steer him away from closing up and not listing.... and this will make him more open to there ideals
Sounds like he needs anger management. How bad can a 1 and 3 year old be?
He needs to go to anger management.
Otherwise your kids will grow up thinking that yelling is the only way to handle all situations and they will be little monster brats that nobody wants to hang around with.
You seem to be a yeller too by the fact you typed in ALL CAPITAL LETTERS WHICH IS YELLING IN THE CYBER WORLD.
You should be on your children's side. You don't want your kids to grow up one day and say that they hate you because you stood by and did nothing about their father yelling at them. If you don't have this stop, they will continue this vicious cycle. It is not right for your husband to do this to the kids. It is abuse! Ask him if a child protection service worker was standing in the room when he yelled at the children, what do you think would happen? I'll tell you, they would think your home was too much of a hostile environment to raise kids. I feel your husband is only repeating what was done to him. If so, ask him to be honest on how it made him feel. You can also stress to him that you don't like it and marriage is about compromise. It is making you feel uncomfortable and he should take your feelings into consideration. There is always ways to discipline your children without being abusive. Read Doctor Phil's Family First. He has very helpful tips on these types of situations. If all else fails and you have to leave to protect your children and get your point across to your husband do what you have to do. He needs to talk to someone because a person should always have enough control to stop something that they know is not right. It is not about what your kids are doing, it is his own personal issues that he needs to resolve.
YOU SHOULD TALK TO YOUR HUSBAND BECAUSE THE KIDS CAN GROW UP KNOWING THAT THEIR DAD YELLS. TRY TO TALK TO HIM AND TELL HIM THAT.
you need to show it....you can't tell a child to stop something if you can't stop it yourself....show them how to stay calm and they will too.
If I was you, I would think about going to see a Psychiatrist.Stuff like that can become a seriouls issue.Do something now.Don't wait!
i agree with danskecat.
your husband needs help. this could develop into a dangerous situation for all of you. go to a therapist. if he doesn't want to listen to you, maybe get one of his friends to tell him, a fresh point of view may be enough.
your children will be influenced by his behavior. they will grow up thinking that this is an acceptable way to act. they will also have emotional problems if this continues, including, but not limited to, low self-esteem and confidence, possible depression, poor relationships, distorted perception of proper social behavior, and, maybe worst of all, they may feel that he does not love them, even though he does.
at their ages, they may not need counseling, but you may find that couples or family therapy is also helpful when combined with his individual therapy.
Good luck to you and your family.
Ya know, my fiance is the same way. I find myself defending the kids too. Maybe its a guy thing. I cant really give advice, because i need some myself.
have you ever heard of monkey see monkey do well if he dose not stop yelling at the kids there going to do the same thing believe me i see it every day (dad needs a time out)
hmmm i think it's time for nanny 911 or jo frost as in super nanny .. i think we all have to stand up for our children because they only have small voices i think that maybe dad instead of yelling at the weee ones maybe he should try going down to there eye level now was dad yelled at a lot by his parents while he was growing up? that would be my question
No comments:
Post a Comment